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Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Getting Over you

There are things I should leave behind; there are things that I must forget; there are things that I should use as a lesson in life and there are things that I should divert into hope and optimism.
Pains and sufferings are just part of my life, sadness and sorrows are elements of getting the complete happiness that I’m looking for so long. Agony and miseries are ingredients of a balance life. I know I’m just human, a human who’s vulnerable to all kinds of emotions.
I thought things will happen according to my plans; I thought that everything will run smoothly as I wished to be. I thought that I’m heading to a clear path….. I thought….. I thought……. I thought

So many occasions led me to solitude and silence. So many instances brought me to emptiness and foolishness. So many circumstances carried me to misfortune and seclusion.
I don’t want to be defeated by my grievances. I don’t want to dwell on the negative side of my life. I don’t want to loose my sanity, and I don’t want to see loosing MY OWN SELF again.
The word that I’m avoiding to hear has been uttered to me. That word has eaten me up wholly. A word of truth that echoes in my heart, a reality that yells in my ears and a powerful scream that tortures my mind and sanity. I hope it will end soon and I hope it’s over now.
Before, I thought I’d already recovered, but now I realized I’m not. I thought I was already healed, but unconsciously the wound refreshes by itself. I thought I’m okay, but I realize I’m just faking it. I thought there’s no more pain, but why it’s reviving into a more painful feeling?
I know I should regain my strength. I know I should stand and move forward. I know that I must overcome my problem victoriously. And I know that I must face the truth courageously. Sometimes truth hurts, like a strong slap on my face but I should withstand these all, to be back in my life and be able to see myself again.

I will wait for the same great feeling to come again. I will wait for wounds to mend and heal. I will wait for other great things in life. I hope I’m not just waiting in vain. I hope in next coming days, weeks, months and years the happiness that I’m searching for so long will be in my doorstep and enter into my life.I HOPE THAT I CAN GET OVER THESE FEELINGS, THIS TIME.

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